Taking your kids to Fast food restaurants, Good? Bad? Make up your mind!

A Manhattan father, in the middle of a divorce and custody battle, is in a fight this week over a decision he made regarding dinner with his son.  David Schorr is a corporate attorney turned consultant with degrees from NYU and Oxford University and has actually filed a lawsuit against the court appointed shrink for defamation because she told the judge deciding the case (between him and his estranged wife) that he is unfit because he refused to take his son to McDonald’s for dinner last week.

Schorr has had partial custody of his 4 year old son for the past two and a half years. The boy threw a tantrum when Schorr told him they could have dinner anywhere but McDonald’s or no dinner at all. Being stubborn, the child chose “no dinner” and after repeatedly trying to change his son’s mind about getting something to eat, to no avail, he dropped him off at his wife’s place where the boy tattled on his father causing the wife to phone the shrink.  In the suit, Schorr’s parenting skills are coming into question because of this incident.  The custody trial resumes in December when the judge will decide if Schorr is fit to parent his son.

Really?  Are we going to say his parenting skills are bad because he’s refused to feed his child greasy fast food?  Or is it because he failed to bow to his child’s temper tantrum?  Maybe it’s because he brought him back to Mom without dinner?  Is it some kind of abuse NOT to take your child to McDonald’s??  COME ON!

Does this Dad deserve a bad wrap for this? What do you think?

Cursing children and F bombs

Just when you think they’re not paying any attention to what you’re doing or saying, playing quietly in the floor facing the wall, beware! Oh, they hear you, believe me, and they will bring that curse word back to life when its utterance will be the most embarrassing for you!


Scene: Four men standing in the garage, each holding an ice cold beer. The man that caught the winning fish of the day regaling his buddies with the “Fish story” of how, when and where he snagged this beauty. Several children and grandchildren riding trikes in the driveway and the 3+ yr old comes running into the kitchen where all us gals (family and neighbors) are chatting and yells, “Gramma, Gramma, Come look at the big f**king fish!” Grandma and the neighbor ladies suck in a deep breath as the cousins all bust up laughing.

Now, this is immediately a mixed message for the child (some laughing and some appalled) and while you have to admit, there’s something inherently funny about a very small child using a very adult word, it’s a teachable moment that you cannot pass up. Whether you are a never-ever kinda parent or the more lenient only-in-certain-circumstances type, a discussion is warranted.

Try not to react one way or another because that’s usually what the child is looking for, a reaction…but don’t ignore the situation. Pulling out a video camera is not the way to go if you’re trying to curtail the cussing but sometimes it’s a surprise:

Young children, up to 5 or so, most likely don’t know what the words mean so you can keep it simple and just tell them not to say it. Talk to them and give them an alternative word they can use to express what they are trying to say. With older children who can think more abstractly, you may want to further explain why they cannot use a particular word. Don’t go ballistic on them. Keep your sense of humor and move on. Remind those around the kids to check themselves.

Oh, and when your 5 yr old says, ”But I heard you/Daddy say it!”, you might want to have a response all ready… :)

Creative Discipline

There are times when you have to think out of the box when doling out punishments with your kids. As you know, not all kids respond to the same things.


Case in point: I knew a certain 8 yr old that was familiar with being sent to her room when she acted up against her little brother. This had become so common (and she had apparently weighed the pros and cons many times) that she wouldn’t even hesitate, she’d just pop him one and head off to her room.

Obviously, this punishment didn’t serve to curb the behavior and Mom had to come up with something more effective. All children are different and sometimes you have to get ‘em where it hurts; what’s most important to them.

Seems cruel though, when you have to take away the birthday party they were to attend next weekend when they’ve been waiting weeks and all their friends are going. Maybe that is a bit stiff for saying a bad word or talking back….BUT maybe it’s about right for heavier infractions like lying or physically hurting other children.

This Mom has decided her creative punishment is a bad attitude jar. http://tinyurl.com/7bp88ay


I’ve known parents that actually ask their child what the punishment should be for what they’ve done…..amazingly enough, most times the kids are actually harder on themselves. Whatever you do, don’t say things like,” You’re never going to the movies again!” or “I’m not making you dinner anymore if you’re not going to eat it!” in the heat of the moment. It’s obviously something you can’t uphold.

Think it through at a time when you’re not mad. What would “speak” to your child most effectively? You know them best after all, so what punishments work for your kids?  -- Donna *WCB