Scene: Four men standing in the garage, each holding an ice cold beer. The man that caught the winning fish of the day regaling his buddies with the “Fish story” of how, when and where he snagged this beauty. Several children and grandchildren riding trikes in the driveway and the 3+ yr old comes running into the kitchen where all us gals (family and neighbors) are chatting and yells, “Gramma, Gramma, Come look at the big f**king fish!” Grandma and the neighbor ladies suck in a deep breath as the cousins all bust up laughing.
Now, this is immediately a mixed message for the child (some laughing and some appalled) and while you have to admit, there’s something inherently funny about a very small child using a very adult word, it’s a teachable moment that you cannot pass up. Whether you are a never-ever kinda parent or the more lenient only-in-certain-circumstances type, a discussion is warranted.
Try not to react one way or another because that’s usually what the child is looking for, a reaction…but don’t ignore the situation. Pulling out a video camera is not the way to go if you’re trying to curtail the cussing but sometimes it’s a surprise:
Young children, up to 5 or so, most likely don’t know what the words mean so you can keep it simple and just tell them not to say it. Talk to them and give them an alternative word they can use to express what they are trying to say. With older children who can think more abstractly, you may want to further explain why they cannot use a particular word. Don’t go ballistic on them. Keep your sense of humor and move on. Remind those around the kids to check themselves.
Oh, and when your 5 yr old says, ”But I heard you/Daddy say it!”, you might want to have a response all ready… :)
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